Päntsdrunk

an essay

In Finland, they've elevated lounging around in your underwear and drinking to an art form. They even have a word for it.

Kalsarikännit

The term is so ingrained in their culture that they've assigned two emojis to it: a man sporting gray boxers with a frothy pint of beer, and a woman in a polka-dot nightie cradling a glass of red wine. Lost in translation, the English equivalent ends up as "Päntsdrunk." And who better to guide us through this fascinating cultural quirk than the Finns themselves?

So, let's delve into this intriguing concept of päntsdrunk. Essentially it means “Drinking alcohol home alone in your underwear with no intention of going out." It's not about getting plastered or pre-gaming before a night out. Päntsdrunk is all about comfort and relaxation. Think of it as hygge, but with more nudity and alcohol.

The Finns are like the Sherpas of social isolation. For nearly three quarters of the year, they endure freezing temperatures and perpetual darkness. The streets become ghost towns, and striking up a conversation requires braving the elements on an epic journey worthy of scaling Mount Everest.

I hail from Astoria, Oregon, not exactly The Himalayas, but rather where the mighty Columbia River kisses the Pacific Ocean. Astoria has deep Finnish roots dating back to the 1880s when Finnish immigrants flocked there for fishing and logging opportunities. My maternal lineage is distinctly Finnish; according to my Ancestry.com DNA test, I'm 40% Finnish. Growing up amidst Finnish influences meant learning phrases from my grandfather who didn't speak English until his first day at school. Every Christmas was sprinkled with Finnish traditions and foods. 

Ironically enough, I've been practicing päntsdrunk long before I knew it was actually a thing, mainly in college. More recently, I found myself quarantined in Helsinki during the summer of 2022 after contracting Covid. I spent five days sipping alcohol in my underwear in my hotel room, unknowingly living out an authentic Finnish tradition.

During my päntsdrunk experience in Helsinki, I was limited to low-alcohol drinks from the nearby grocery store (S-Market) due to Finland's strict alcohol laws. Anything stronger than 8% requires a trip to Alko, Finland’s national liquor stores. However, I didn't have the energy to walk six blocks to Alko, so the low-proof options at S-Market around the corner sufficed. Just to clarify, the goal is NOT to get drunk. The Finnish Long Drink in a can (with its refreshing mixture of gin and grapefruit soda) was all I needed for company. 

So next time you're home alone in your underwear with a drink in hand, remember this… you're not being lazy or promoting alcoholism; you're practicing a Finnish tradition. Kippis!